Happiness is a warm....

I've been going through some difficult times lately. MY wife moved out last July 14th, claiming I was the Anti-Christ, and a snowball effect seemed to take place after that. Let me tell you first and foremost - I STILL LOVE THE WOMAN. The moment I met her, I knew she was the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my sorry assed days with. Shortly thereafter, I came to realize she didn't love me NEARLY as much as I was in love with her. It was a painful thing to realize. She went out of her way to try to start fights with me over trivial nonsense. I'm generally an easy-going person, so I mellowed out things as best I could. Flash forward six months or so, I ask her to move in with me. She accepts, and we begin the journey that every couple makes. I was very, very happy. I was with a woman I loved, upwardly mobile in my career, and looking toward the future with a woman I loved by my side. I thought life was pretty friggin' good. Shortly thereafter, a mutually planned (if there is such a thing) "oops" produced our daughter, Hope. She's six and a a half now, sharp as a whip and the apple of her daddy's eye. Our son, Darrien, came a year and a half after her birth. I love them both dearly.

Relationships are strange. Right now, I don't care to ever, ever care again for another woman. I know that sounds callous and sad, but I WAS WITH A WOMAN I LOVED WHO DIDN'T REALLY LOVE ME. I'm a damaged person. I know that, and I'm trying to fight it, telling myself that all women aren't like my wife. We had a second child (our son, Darrien) about a year and a half after Hope. I married her then. Not because I had to, but because I loved her and she was the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my days with.

Last July 14th, those days stopped.

There was no discussion. No "you've done this" or "I've done that". She just left. In the past year, I've pleaded with her to reunite our family, but my pleas have gone unheeded. I wrote a book about my experience. It's called "TALES FROM THE CELLAR" and can be ordered now from my website (www.rogerdaletrexler.com). I finished printing the book tonight. I told myself I'd try to let her go and move on the moment I finished the book. I held off printing it for four months after I'd finished editing it in the hope there would be a future betwixt us. Now, I have to let her go.

Pray for me, my friends. I still love my wife....even if she never loved me.

Roger